DS Report 3: Penguin Factory

Here is Downright silly report number 3!

Unknown to most historians, a British colony that settled in the southeast of America, has an interesting story. It arrived in the year 1598 and formed a settlement. It was named after the land it sat on, "Iuh don'tuh thinkee ita isa goodai deeuh". That's Indian for, "Land of the Penguins".

When Industrialism and factories broke out in the 1800's, the south retained it's cash crops, such as cotton and tabaco. "Land of the Penguins" grew into a city by that time and was renamed, "Terrapenguin". Combining Latin, terra, for land, and English's penguin to keep the oringal meaning. The city of Terrapenguin made one of the few factories built in the South.

Unlike most factories, it produced penguins. Having made a trade route to Antartica, Terrapenguin imported penguins by the bucket load. After over a hundred penguins were brought to America, they were breeded so that they could multiply. They were then cleaned, fed, and given tools; all in stages on an assembly line. Next, they were placed in boxes that could fit five, ten, or twenty penguins. They were then shipped to anyone who ordered them.

Unfortunatly , the telegraph wasn't invented for another 30 years in 1837. So it was impractical to order something that could not be signaled quickly. The penguin factory quit and went on to produce rubber gloves especially made were for slapping people.

If the factory had held out for 37 more years, it might have stopped slavery. You see, the penguins enjoyed the warmer climate of the south, and loved to do work. The penguins could've replaced black slaves and prevented the Civil War.

On the positive side, if the penguins had replaced the slaves and stopped the Civil War, blacks still wouldn't have any say in government and still wouldn't be citizens of America. Also, Abraham Lincoln wouldn't be famous and he would've have written the Gettysburg Adress.

Even though this was a big letdown for penguin production, the factory was relocated to California in 1875 and placed into the hands of a young man named Andrew Buckheimer. Since the telephone was invented in 1876, penguin production has doubled, and is still a main export of the United States.