JC Report 4: Miracle Brother

It's time for another Jesus Christ Report!


I bet you think miracles don't happen anymore, right? WRONG! Let me tell you about a miracle I experienced. I shall never forget it.

6 years ago... I was 5 years old... (No, it wasn't a dark and stormy night). My mom was pregnant at the time. I was playing early in the morning, when I heard a baby cry. I ran into my dad's room and jumped into his bed. Just then, my sister, Alisa, came in saying she heard a baby cry, too. My dad suggested we search the house for a baby. No baby was found. We all thought it was very strange. And it wasn't a vague cry either, not something you can just say it was your imagination. It was clear, though distant.

Months later... We came into the hospital, for my mom gave birth to a baby boy. I came in with the rest of the family, and saw Zachary, my new little brother, crying in a bassinet as the doctor was giving him a check-up. Now, that wasn't strange, except the sound of the cry. It was the same cry we heard months before! My dad said it was God letting us know that Zachary was coming.

Now maybe you don't think that's a miracle, but to me, it was a great miracle. God had let me see a glimpse of His great glory. And if you think that's big, these kind of miracles... are only the beginning.

Dedicated to Zachary Thomas San Vicente. A great brother... most of the time.

JC Report 3: For His Name's sake

It's time for another Jesus Christ Report!

Have you ever heard the phrase, "for Your name's sake" during a prayer? Have you ever read the old testament and heard about God doing amazing things (like the plagues on Egypt) for the reason of showing his power? At first, I thought it meant God is God and he needs to be glorified. He's the only one who can show off. But then I thought, God's perfect. Why would he do things for the sake of pride? I then learned from a very wise man (talked about in a previous blog) that God does this out of love.
You see, God needs to have his name and deeds magnified in order for other people to hear about his love. If people hear of his love, they'll want to be saved. If they never heard about him, how could they be saved by him?
As for the phrase, "for Your name's sake", this is used to show mercy. For example, one time, the Israelites disobeyed God one too many times. So he decided to wipe them out. But Moses prayed to God and asked him to spare the Israelites "for His name's sake". That's a noble cause. If God wiped them out, it would tarnish His reputation, and people wouldn't want to follow God. So God spared them.
In conclusion, God is not all about his image. He loves us all, and wants us hear of his loving deeds.

Did You Know? Fact 3

And now, it's time for... "Did You Know?"

Fact 3: Did you know that Curious George doesn't have a tail? It's true, and I have a picture to prove it! (It wasn't easy, either). You may be asking, "When did you discover this fact?" Well, it happened when I was five years old. Me, my big brother, and my dad were on a trip. I brought along my collection of Curious George books for my dad to read to me. While we were reading one of them, we discovered this picture. It was so funny, that we called our family back home. They all laughed too, and we shared our guesses as to why Curious George doesn't have a tail. At first we thought his tail was lost in a lawn mower accident. Then we realized that George may not be a monkey after all! So if he's not a monkey, what is he? Our conclusion: He is just... an ugly child. (pretty hairy, too, I might add).

Well, you know it now! And don't you forget it!

Did you know? Fact 2

And now, it's time for... "Did You Know?"

Fact 2: Did you know that according to the NBE (National Buck Encyclopedia), these lists can help you live a happier, healthier, and more bearable life.

The top three travesties

1. Owning a cat.
2. A cookie with no chocolate chips.
3. And the worst travesty... no siblings. Dun dun dun dun! Dun dun dun dunnnn!!!!

The things you never do

1. Never start a land war in Asia
2. Never get a landlord from Asia.
3. Never mess with a Sicilian, when death is on the line... ha ha ha ha ha ha! ha!..... Klunk!

Never treat your dog this way

1. Never let him indoors.
2. Never feed him people food.
3. Never give him access to the Internet.
4. Never tell your dog where you keep your money.

Things every boy ought to do

1. Hear the "What every boy needs to know about being a man" speech.
2. Read "Destiny, Valor, and a Lizard named Louie".
3. Watch at least one Muppet movie.

Adventure has to be

1. New.
2. Exciting.
3. Dangerous (to some extent).

Well, you know it now! And don't you forget it!

copyright 2008 national buck encyclopedia inc. all rights reserved.

Wise sayings of Buckspeare. Issue 1

And now... wise sayings from Buckspeare!

"You go out the same way you got in; otherwise, you run through a wall."

"Late to bed, late to rise, makes one sick, poor, and dumb."

"It is more blessed to give than to receive... especially when it comes to speeding tickets."

And that... was wise sayings from Buckspeare!
Read next time to hear Buck say, "Why does William keep shaking his spear?"

DS report 4: Funny Pictures 1

There are those who are awake... and there are those who are asleep.

There are those who brush their teeth... and there are those who don't!

There are good hair days.. and there are bad hair days.

DS Report 3: Penguin Factory

Here is Downright silly report number 3!

Unknown to most historians, a British colony that settled in the southeast of America, has an interesting story. It arrived in the year 1598 and formed a settlement. It was named after the land it sat on, "Iuh don'tuh thinkee ita isa goodai deeuh". That's Indian for, "Land of the Penguins".

When Industrialism and factories broke out in the 1800's, the south retained it's cash crops, such as cotton and tabaco. "Land of the Penguins" grew into a city by that time and was renamed, "Terrapenguin". Combining Latin, terra, for land, and English's penguin to keep the oringal meaning. The city of Terrapenguin made one of the few factories built in the South.

Unlike most factories, it produced penguins. Having made a trade route to Antartica, Terrapenguin imported penguins by the bucket load. After over a hundred penguins were brought to America, they were breeded so that they could multiply. They were then cleaned, fed, and given tools; all in stages on an assembly line. Next, they were placed in boxes that could fit five, ten, or twenty penguins. They were then shipped to anyone who ordered them.

Unfortunatly , the telegraph wasn't invented for another 30 years in 1837. So it was impractical to order something that could not be signaled quickly. The penguin factory quit and went on to produce rubber gloves especially made were for slapping people.

If the factory had held out for 37 more years, it might have stopped slavery. You see, the penguins enjoyed the warmer climate of the south, and loved to do work. The penguins could've replaced black slaves and prevented the Civil War.

On the positive side, if the penguins had replaced the slaves and stopped the Civil War, blacks still wouldn't have any say in government and still wouldn't be citizens of America. Also, Abraham Lincoln wouldn't be famous and he would've have written the Gettysburg Adress.

Even though this was a big letdown for penguin production, the factory was relocated to California in 1875 and placed into the hands of a young man named Andrew Buckheimer. Since the telephone was invented in 1876, penguin production has doubled, and is still a main export of the United States.

Hol. Report 1: Valentine's Day

"Hol" stands for Holiday. What is Valentine's Day all about? In my opinion, Valentine's Day is a day when we appreciate the people we love, our brother(s), sister(s), and parents. It's also about appreciating God who gave us these people.

No, I don't think that it's about sending cards with a bear on it saying, "Have a "beary" good Valentine's Day.

In other people's opinions, Valentine's Day is a commercial holiday for greedy store owners to make a extra buck between Christmas and Easter.

JC Report 2: The eyes

Here is another Jesus Christ report. Oculi est anime de janua. That is Latin for "The eyes are the door to the soul". That's a passage from the Bible, and it not only is Biblical, it's applicable.

A person can be smiling, yet the person's eyes say different. At other times a person can be not smiling, yet the eyes show the person is happy. But, most of the time, the person's smile and eyes tell the same story. For example, see the first picture.

Fam. Report 1: The whole family

"Fam" stands for family. Let me tell you about my family. I'm gonna go in order of youngest to oldest. Let's start with my baby brother, Joshua. He's a nice guy, good-looking, and kind of funny, in a baby sort of way. He's pretty smart. My dad says he understands a lot more than he speaks. I agree with him. I'm almost sure he thinks about tough math problems.

Next, my little brother Zachary. He's fun to play with and understands most of what I talk about. He's funny, in a six-year-oldesh kind of way. Especially when he says big words that suprise my parents, like "actually", "concentration", and, of course, "nuclear missile".

That brings us to me, but I try keep my life as secret as possible. The less you know... the better.

Skipping ahead, we get to my big sister Alisa. She likes good books, writes good books, and can at times be downright goofy and/or funny. She listens to my long talks about, well, everything. She's also glad she has a big sister, Christine.

Christine is goofy and funny. (Gee, being funny must run in the family). She loves kids, enjoys watching movies with Zachary, and loves golden retriever puppies. Through all that, she still remains earnest when it comes to things like school.

Then comes my big brother Ryan. He has a great sense of humor and is... you guessed it, very funny. He the only one I can quote movie lines to and will understand where I'm coming from. He's a fun guy to have around.

Last but not least we get to my parents, Mom and Dad. The names have been changed to protect the parental. My Mom, boy, can she cook! She's a great teacher and at just the right time, says something that sets the whole family laughing. (You should've seen that coming).

My Dad is a well of wisdom. From hugs to long talks, he's the guy to go to. He usually has a good answer to all the questions I have about God. Can you guess what comes next? Yep, you saw it coming, he's funny too.


In conclusion, I thank God for giving me a great, big family! (Oh, and did a mention that they're funny?)

Did You Know? Fact 1

And now, it's time for... "Did You Know?"!



Fact 1: Did you know that Shakespeare spelled his name this way, Shakespeare, and this way, Shakespear. If you already knew that, did you know that there has been many other variations of his name? Such as, Shotspeare, Steakspeare, Shake-your-own-spear, and my favorite... Shockspeare! Here is a quote by Steakspeare when he saw his burnt steak, "Such a dark and dreary steak I have not seen!".



Well, you know it now! And don't you forget it!

JC Report 1: Evangelism Linebacker

"JC" stands for Jesus Christ. Here is something I found, that I thought was funny. Enjoy! (Listen to what he's saying, it sometimes rhymes). Not that this video is completely G rated.

 

I especially like the trash part. Oh, here's a person's comment on this video:

This is extremely funny and sometimes I wish it was accepted by our culture and/or effective... just joking.

DS report 2: A new discovery

Here is another downright silly report. I have discovered a formula that will help kids with younger siblings. Simply square the time you think it will take to escape your sibling, subtract your sibling's estimated awareness (as a decimal), add your estimated sneakiness (as a decimal), and divide it all by 5. You may need a calculator. Here's an example:

The formula for escaping your little brother/sister

%OE = t squared – A + S
5

Jerry wants to escape from his little brother. If the estimated time it takes to escape from his little brother is 2 minutes, and the percentage of his brother’s awareness is 60%, and the percentage of his sneakiness is 50%, what are his chances of escape in percentage? (Round to the nearest whole number if necessary).

%OE = (t squared – A + S) divided by 5

%OE = (t squared - .60 + .50) divided by 5

%OE = (4 - .60 + .50) divided by 5

%OE = (4 - .10) divided by 5

%OE = 3.9 divided by 5

%OE = .78

Jerry’s chances of escaping are 78%.

copyright 2008 buck research facility.

DS Report 1: Gorillas

People of Earth! Do not be alarmed! My message will be brief. I have a secretary named Zachary. He also doubles as my little brother.
"DS" stands for Downright Silly. Here is my report: Never attack a pack of gorillas unless you have guns, dynamite, or a squad of specially trained attack penguins.
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